Emi has come such a long way in her first five months. She had such a rough start during her days as the Bionic Woman and has grown to be such a healthy, chubby, bright eyed wonder. I am feeling a lot of different feelings right now about Emi, the biggest one being thankful but I am also being reminded of the terror and the fear that ripped through my insides during the entire ordeal.
The main reason I’m so clingy right now is because one of my friends is going through a similar, yet far worse scenario with her newborn son. I met Dotty while we were stationed in Germany and her husband was in Dean’s unit there. We became friends and I got to meet the arrival of their first son, Mikey. After we were transferred to Texas, she and her husband had another son named Chance and they are such a great little family. Then, at the beginning of the year she found out she was pregnant again with another son only this time, things got scary.
Dotty found out at 19 weeks pregnant that her baby was suffering from a Congenital diaphragmatic hernia which is a disorder where the baby’s diaphragm doesn’t keep the abdominal organs in the abdomen. Instead, they rise up into the chest and squash the lungs and the heart and cause a whole list of problems. Babies who suffer from this are given surgery soon after birth and many, many don’t survive. The mortality rate is ridiculously high and to face such a thing is…. horrid. Dotty’s doctors suggested terminating the pregnancy and she chose not to and on October 26th her baby boy, Zachary Logan was born 7 weeks early. He was given surgery and is still hospitalized but holding on. While her two boys are in one city, she and her husband are shuttling back and forth to another city to be with their baby. It couldn’t be more difficult.
This breaks my heart and all the memories of the fear and sadness that I felt with Emi come flying back. I just wish that I had magical healing hands that could take all the pain away but I can’t. It’s only been five months since Emi was born but it feels like much longer for some reason. The only thing I know with a certainty is that I would have been devastated had I lost her. She is magic. Every single thing about this baby brightens me down to my soul. She is perfection with every grin or laugh, every pouty lip or squeal out loud. I look at all the photos of her from just five months ago as she was the baby attached to the tubes with things stuck in her body and she just doesn’t look like the same child to me. It took her almost two weeks after she was born to open those blue eyes and look at me and now they sparkle and laugh and I just stare deeply into them as much as possible.
She has come so far. The tiny, frail, bruised little baby is now a chubby, round ball of delight and I am so lucky. I am hoping and praying with all of my energy that Zachary Logan will be free from his tubes and home with his family safely and full of health. I hope that Dotty is as lucky as we were.
Please keep her and her family and baby Zach in your thoughts and prayers…
Now, enough of Miss Emi… here are a few pictures of Little Zach so you know who you are praying for. And if you’d like to read Zach’s blog, you can do so by clicking here. Feel free to leave a message or wish them good luck and warm thoughts.