Inside the mind of America’s (raunchy, foul mouthed, overly opinionated, sexually aggressive, incredibly offensive, fly by the minute, ridiculously absurd, often times erratic, psychologically questionable) Sweetheart.

Fuck off, Ray! October 2, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — the108 @ 1:57 am

The stubborn, old shitbag is now missing. He has fallen off the face of the planet.

Just for a few famous WTF? faces, let me now explain to you all the story as I have been told today by shit bag in-law’s neighbor. According to her, she left her apartment next door and saw the maintenance man pounding like hell on Ray’s door. She asks what is wrong and he tells her that water is pouring into the apartment downstairs and that he has been banging on Ray’s door forever. She says, “fuck that.. I have a key!” and let’s the guy in.

When they get inside, there is Ray standing in the middle of the living room looking extremely wasted and terribly confused. There is water…. everywhere. M.M (maintenance man) runs to the bathroom and shuts off the tub while N.L. (neighbor lady) asks him what the fuck he is doing.

Well, Ray hasn’t a clue. He is staggering drunk and claims that he fell asleep and that he just woke up to all this fucking water everywhere. There seems to be a leak, he says.

A LEAK!!! The tub was on full force ya fucking drunk!

Ray then takes a long, bewildered look around and makes this statement of genius to M.M and N.L.:

“Um.. I don’t think I have enough newspaper to clean this up.”

NEWSPAPER??? There is easily six inches of water covering the entire apartment and the drunk ass-bag wants to try to soak it up with fucking newspaper???? Needless to say, Ray was given thirty days notice to evict, something he had the gal to go to a lawyer and try to fight. He is still claiming there was a leaky pipe and that was the cause of the damage and therefore, he is unwilling to pay for it. Sober up, you fucking idiot!

Ray sits around and drinks for the entire thirty days without telling anyone he has been evicted and at the last minute, in a drunken stupor, he gives away everything he owns and declares that he will be moving into a motel until he can find a furnished apartment.Then, at ten this morning he leaves the house and now no one can find him.

N.L. tells me that he hangs out at this bar up the street and so I look up the number and call there and talk to the bartender and the manager who are so sweet and kind and who have, according to them, had to carry my 77 year old FIL out of the bar and pay for his cab fare on more than one occasion. I thank them for taking such good care of him and then I ask if in the future they can cut him off and start bringing him shots of water instead and I assure them that he won’t notice since he doesn’t even remember that he has four grandchildren. They do one better and the bartender agrees to go motel hopping tomorrow before shift in search of the old drunk-ass and I am blown away by this kindness.

In the meantime, I have spent the day on the phone with various people and on the internet trying to locate a new home for the old man once we locate him.

He refuses to go into a home because the stipulations require that he not drink.

So, here I sit going through every apartment in his price range trying to locate one on the beach where he has always dreamed of living and I haven’t a clue why I do this because I hate this old sack of crap anyhow. He fucking pisses me off.

I don’t feel the least bit bad about hating this fucker because he hates me just as much. I cannot believe that this is what has come of this lunatic. Just so that you all don’t start feeling bad for him as I call him every name in the book, here is a short list of why I loathe him:

1. When I got pregnant with Matt, he and his wife invited me over for dinner and when I got there… there were people from an adoption agency there as well with papers for me to sign. Mr. and Mrs. Crapbag had told them that we wanted to give up our baby and it was an interesting dinner to say the least.

2. They babysat Matthew and got shitfaced drunk and passed out when he was six months old. As a result, I told them they would never babysit again and so

3. They called me and told me that they were going to plant drugs in my car and call the cops so that I would lose Matthew and they would get him.

4. They informed everyone at a family dinner that I had confided in them that I was a whore and wasn’t sure that Dean was my baby daddy. I have never lived that down.

5. AFTER Dean and I were married and had two kids, they set him up on a date with a girl who lived nearby. Very subtle, huh?

6. Pulled out a shoebox one christmas full of photographs of the two of them fucking and made me look at them.

7. Ray helped Peggy kill herself off the booze by buying it for her when she was too drunk to go get it herself. He didn’t want to deal with her.

8. While Dean was in high school, they made him hunt down drugs for him and then they got him high.

9. Every single person who I met that knew them was somehow misinformed that I had STD’S.

10. When I was in the hospital giving birth, he and Mrs. Crapbag showed up so wasted that they frightened everyone in the waiting room and the administration came in and told Dean that he had to get them the fuck out of there. As a result, Dean nearly missed the birth of Matthew and afterwards as I lie recovering, the shitheads returned and created an even bigger spectacle. It was insane.

And because I’m such a dick, I sat by bedsides and held hands and listened while they cried drunkenly and begged me to forgive them and then two seconds later they would tell me that they hated me and wished I would just die already and I cannot believe that I sat there for all of this horseshit or that I’m sitting here doing it again for this piece of shit.

God, I hate him.


12 Responses to “Fuck off, Ray!”

  1. Rocketstar Says:

    sounds like an asshole.

  2. EC Says:

    Wow – he is one fucked up man!!

    Stay far away Kyra and don’t lift one finger to help him!!

  3. Brian in Mpls Says:

    I saw myself in that story and it made me sad

  4. Matt-Man Says:

    Sorry to hear all of this Kyra, but try to move beyond it and dont let the hate eat you up…even though it is well-deserved.

  5. Sparky Duck Says:

    yea what Matt Man said, which is scary, because its Matt Man

  6. Dixiechick Says:

    A total asshole and I’d be damn if I’d lift on finger to help his sorry ass …

  7. Bond Says:

    What i get from this sorrowful tale is that even after all that has happened, YOU – MS. 108, SWEET KYRA – are still taking time away from the situations you are dealing with to try and find solitude for this man who will not even remember it.

    YOU are a marvelous human being….

    One I feel blessed to have met across the cyberwaves….

  8. Tom Says:

    Kyra, Kyra, Kyra. You might feel better if you jazzed up your main page a bit, you know, maybe put in some links, shit like that.

  9. Colette, aka Lil Sis Says:

    What a jackass. How is Dean handling this? You shouldn’t have to deal with this, but I’m with Bond. You are a better woman than I because after those 10 things alone the asshole would have been missing long before this escapade. 😉

  10. Susie PSU Says:

    I admire you. You are doing what you don’t have to do. For someone you don’t have to do it for. You’re a good girl, Kyra.

  11. Dee Says:

    You are an amazing person to try and help that piece of shit after all that has been done to you. Wow.

  12. amanda Says:

    I don’t know why I’m doing this, but…
    I feel it necessary to say that all elders are do some level of respect, however miniscule and undeserved it may be. If he accoplished nothing else, Ray did father one awesome, talented, intelligent guy. Also, we don’t want to turn into Ray when we get old, as will be our karma if we diss him too much….lol

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