Inside the mind of America’s (raunchy, foul mouthed, overly opinionated, sexually aggressive, incredibly offensive, fly by the minute, ridiculously absurd, often times erratic, psychologically questionable) Sweetheart.

Life August 29, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — the108 @ 10:55 pm

Life is different now. Life is lawyers. It is protection from those who are out to hurt you. Life is restraining orders. It’s investigations. It’s children being relocated. It’s soldiers being terrorized. Life is an order of protection for your family. Life is mothers who are fighting like hell, toe to toe against the world. Life is congressmen and polictical activists. Life is media. It’s courtrooms. It is 85 phone calls a day from scared doctors, frightenened soldiers, inpsector generals… it is staring straight ahead at the wall with your head down and your whole body shaking in fear saying, “I will not speak without my attorney present.”. Life is police reports. It is swollen, bloody hands. It is being chased and hunted. It’s constant, debilitating fear.

Life is different now.

No one is dead. Many wish they were, many deserve to be.

This is life. People say it will look up, but it doesn’t. When the gun is in your mouth and your finger is on the trigger and people will try to tell you that it will be okay….

No one is saying that right now. In fact, the psychiatrists are calling with much concern. Even they know that a bullet to the head is welcome at this point.

Life is fear. It is unbelievable fear.

You all keep emailing me asking if I am still alive. I am alive.

But I don’t want to be.

I have to go. More at some point.


12 Responses to “Life”

  1. Susie PSU Says:


    TYPE to us. We are here for you. How can we help? What is going on??

  2. Turnbaby Says:

    Kyra—reaching out is a good thing–keep it up.

  3. ian Says:

    I was just thinking about you earlier today. We’re here if you need us.


  4. Colette, aka Lil Sis Says:

    Kyra…we’re here if you need us. I’m a little worried over here! =)

  5. TopChamp Says:

    not your most comforting post……. Anything I can do? Let me know if so.

  6. Jodi Says:

    I have been reading your blog for a while just not posting anything. I hope everything is ok! Take care, Kyra.

  7. Brian in Mpls Says:

    I am here if you need to talk…

  8. Bond Says:

    Dear friend….it has been said by everyone else, you know how to reach out…PLEASE do so anytime…day or night…


  9. Rocketstar Says:

    That was heavy, heavy with dispair. Hang in there 108. You can make it.

  10. ~Paige~ Says:

    i agree with rocket…hang in there. you will get through this

  11. EC Says:

    I’ll be here if you ever want to talk 😦 i’m sorry you are going through all of this Kyra – you’re a special woman and deserve someone equally as special in your life!

  12. Julie Says:

    You’re tough girl….keep on persevering dear.

    When I wanted to die someone handed me his service revolver and in a snarky way said, “Here you go, do it.” I’m so glad I didn’t.

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