Inside the mind of America’s (raunchy, foul mouthed, overly opinionated, sexually aggressive, incredibly offensive, fly by the minute, ridiculously absurd, often times erratic, psychologically questionable) Sweetheart.

Presidential Deathmatch 2 June 1, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — the108 @ 6:27 pm

Presidential Death Match continues as I sit down with Matthew for a little interview on politics and World Issues. We shall compare his responses with the previous statements made by our President, George W. Bush and see where each stacks up against the other.

1. What is your personal definition of “leadership”?

Bush: “I have a different vision of leadership. A leadership is someone who brings people together.”

Matthew:”Caring about your people and helping them even if it means risking your own life.”

2.Why were our troops sent into Iraq?

Bush:”Whether or not it needed to happen, I’m still convinced it needed to happen.”

Matthew: “Because George Bush feels like he needs to get money.”

3. What makes books so important?

Bush: “One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures.”

Matthew: “They give knowlege about all kinds of things and sometimes they can help you learn.”

4.What is an OB/GYN?

Bush:”Too many good docs are getting out of business. Too many OB/GYN’s aren’t able to practice their, their love with women all across this country.”

Matthew: “A doctor who specializes in prenancy and birth.”

5. Who is the First Lady?

Bush: “The most important job is not to be governor, or first lady in my case.”

Matthew: “Mrs. Washington. George Washington’s wife.”

6. Should we place National Guard units at the Mexican Border to keep them out of the country?

Bush: “That makes sense to me, don’t it?”

Matthew: “No, because everyone is different but we are all the same because we are people and we shouldn’t keep other people away.”

7.Would you ever do Cocaine?

Bush: “I’ve made mistakes.. I haven’t done cocaine during the past seven, no twenty-five years.”

Matthew: “No, because then I’d get drunk and sometimes when you’re drunk there is another side of you that makes you do bad things.”

8.In 1964, Yale decided to start admitting women into their college. What do you think of that?

Bush:“That’s when Yale really started going downhill.”

Matthew: “That’s a great thing. Everyone has the right to learn.”

9. Is George Bush a boy or a girl?

Bush:”Karyn is with us. A West Texas girl, just like me.”

Matthew: “Boy.”

10.Should we be looking for Osama bin Laden?

Bush:“I don’t know where he is. I have no idea and I really don’t care. It’s not that important. It’s not our priority.”

Matthew: “Yes, but only to put him in jail… not to kill him because even though he did something terrible to us, we shouldn’t do the same thing or we;d be just as bad.”

11.What do Republicans find important?

Bush:“Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child”

Matthew: “Republicans… those are those people who like money, right? They are selfish because they only care about people who already have money.”

12. How does it make you feel to know that we are at war with Iraq?

Bush:“Feels Good!”

Matthew: “Sad, because George W. Bush is sending soldiers out for terrible reasons and Dad could get sent out and die for one of those reasons.”

13. How are the border relations between Canada and Mexico?

Bush: “Border relations between Canada and Mexico have never been better.”

Matthew: “Canada is north of us and Mexico is south, so…um… so there is no border between them unless you count the United States as a border.”

14. Is Texas a state or a country?

Bush: “We’re in for a long struggle, and I think Texans understand that. And so do Americans.”

Matthew:”Texas is a state in America. Texans ARE Americans.”

15.What’s your favorite story from your childhood?

Bush: “The Very Hungry Caterpillar.” (which was published in 1983 when Bush was 37 years old)

Matthew: “The Cat in the Hat. I loved that book when I was a kid.” (He ACTUALLY said that…lol– awesome!)

I have asked Matthew these questions exactly as I have written them and have given his answers verbatim. He answered these questions with a tone in his voice like he couldn’t believe I was asking them, like I’m an idiot or something. The words quoted by Bush are actual quotes made by him as well. None of this has been made up.

** I would also just like to say that the political viewpoints expressed here were by the boy and do not in any way reflect my own political beliefs with the exception of being extremely similar. It is merely a coincidence,,,, I swear. the108 is not responsible for any hard feelings and the readers can feel free to direct any and all complaints he or she may have to Matthew, who will certainly not back down from a debate. However, if you are a member of the NRA, stay the fuck away from him.**

I must say that I would sooner vote for Matthew in an election than I would Dubya anyday. I also found that interviewing my kids was fun, interesting and highly enlightening…… so much so, that I think I will begin conducting weekly interviews with them where I ask them questions about all sorts of different topics not pertaining to politics.

It will be an interesting study on how the minds of children work.

As for this round of Presidential Death Match, I score Matt as the winner.

No recount necessary.


Just for fun, I will leave you with this gem:

President Bush: “Peter. Are you going to ask that question with shades on?”

Peter Wallsten of the Los Angeles Times: “I can take them off.”

Bush: “I’m interested in the shade look, seriously.”

Wallsten: “All right, I’ll keep it, then.”

Bush: “For the viewers, there’s no sun.”

Wallsten: “I guess it depends on your perspective.”

Bush: “Touché.”

—Exchange with legally blind reporter Peter Wallsten, Washington, D.C., June 14, 2006


4 Responses to “Presidential Deathmatch 2”

  1. EC Says:

    LMAO – Hysterical!!

    Score 1 for Matthew!!!! He wins 🙂

  2. Brian in Mpls Says:

    I am not even kidding this is one of the most clever things I have ever read!!! Not only are you sexy but you are extremely brillant!!!

  3. the108 Says:

    Brian… which one will get me laid? Sexiness or brilliance?

  4. Sparky Duck Says:

    The OBGYN question is an instant comedy classic. I still remember wanting to bash my head into the steering wheel the first time I heard it.

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